The Little Red Hen and Monsanto

I feel obliged to note that this is a parody, and in no way reflects any actual experience with Monsanto. Just for the record, at this time (April 2, 1014  2014) Monsanto has not released any GMO wheat, although it is discussing the possibility of doing so in the next few years.

                                       Red hen, Anchorage, May 24, 2013. [Photo, TW Carns]

Once upon a time a Little Red Hen found some grains of wheat while she was scratching in the barn yard, and decided to make bread. She asked her friends the donkey, the pig and the dog, “Who would like to eat some delicious warm bread?” The donkey, the pig, and the dog all said, “Oh yeah! We’d love some warm delicious bread.”

The Little Red Hen said, “Who will help me grow this wheat to make the bread?” And the donkey, and the pig, and the dog all said, “We are soooo busy! Not us.” But the gentleman from Monsanto who had just spread the grains of wheat in front of the Little Red Hen said, “That just happens to be Round-up Ready (Trademarked) wheat that we’ve been wanting to test. Will you be so kind as to try it out for us?” So the Little Red Hen said “Sure, why not?”

                        Southwest Michigan winter wheat field, mid-April 2013 [Photo, M. Glueckert]

The Little Red Hen planted the Monsanto wheat in her carefully-tilled field and watched it sprout and grow bright and green Then came the day to pull the weeds that had grown equally bright and green in among the wheat stalks. The Little Red Hen said, “Who will help me weed the wheat?” The donkey, and the pig, and the dog all said, “That is not the sort of work we are cut out to do.” But the Monsanto gentleman said, “Spray a little Roundup (Trademarked) and the weeds will go away.” So the Little Red Hen bought some Round-up from Monsanto, sprayed her wheat, and the weeds shriveled away as advertised.

     Southwest Michigan wheat field, June 21, 2013 [Photo, M. Glueckert]

The grain waxed golden, and the Little Red Hen said, “Who will help me harvest this wheat?” The donkey, and the pig, and the dog all said, “That’s character-building work, and as you can see, we are already bursting with character. We do not need to help harvest.” The Monsanto gentleman said, “I can put you in touch with some harvesters,” and he did. They came, cut the wheat, and gave it to the Little Red Hen, who paid them well for their work. 

The Little Red Hen had to grind the wheat into flour, and she knew better than to ask the donkey, the pig, and the dog to help. So she took it to a mill where they removed the vitamin-rich bran and germ (which they sold to health food stores), and added in vitamins and minerals, as required by the FDA. They brought the fine white flour to the Little Red Hen in artisanal sacks, charging her a very reasonable amount extra for the nice packaging.

           
                                                             Flour sack image.

The Little Red Hen said, “It’s time to make this flour into bread. Who will help me?” The donkey, and the pig, and the dog all said, “We probably shouldn’t help because we might get it wrong.” The gentleman from Monsanto said, “We have friends who will make your flour into bread.” The Little Red Hen turned over all of her flour to the recommended bakers who put it into a monstrous large kneading machine with mono- and di-glycerides, sodium stearol lactylate, calcium sulfate (aka gypsum), and high fructose corn syrup (among other ingredients). They shaped it, and proofed it, and baked it before giving it to the Little Red Hen after she paid her baking fee.

                                              Bread, May 12, 2013. [Photo, TW Carns]

Along came the donkey, the pig, and the dog, and said, “Let us help you eat that bread. There’s way too much for you.” But the Monsanto gentleman came along and said, “No way. Little Red Hen invited me to dinner. She is going to cook bread pudding with mountain oysters, and we’re going to eat it all ourselves.” And they did.

                                         Savory bread pudding (minus the Rocky Mountain oysters).

                                      Red hen, Susanne and Thomas's, July 2011. [Photo, TW Carns]

Wheat, Weather, and Trade Updates, Late May 2013

Michigan winter wheat, heading, May 24, 2013 [Micki Glueckert photo].



The biggest news of the week was the discovery of an experimental GMO wheat in an Oregon field. The U. S. Department of Agriculture said that there are no genetically modified varieties of wheat that are approved for planting in the U.S. or elsewhere. Monsanto said that the field in which the Round-up ready wheat was found had not been used in its testing program a decade ago, and that it did not think that any Round-up ready wheat had gotten into commercial lots.

Japan said that it was cancelling orders for white wheat, and South Korea soon said that it too would halt purchases until it could test the incoming crops. The European Union has a long-standing policy of not allowing any genetically-modified crops across its borders and said that it would test shipments.

Because the U.S. is the world's largest wheat exporter, and because most other countries are nervous about genetically modified crops, the stray seeds could cause sizable economic shakeups. The New York Times article notes that Spain, once the Romans' bread basket, is now a major importer of United States wheat. Egypt, the country in which wheat came to maturity as a crop thousands of years ago, is now the world's largest importer of wheat, and according to a European wheat dealer, might not be in a position to be choosy about the crops that it takes.

As wheat prices fell, then rose, experts speculated about who might benefit -- Canada? Europe? Australia? Australians say that they are selling enough internally to livestock producers that they might have a hard time helping out. Canadians and Europeans are waiting to see how the further testing and investigation being done by Monsanto and the U.S. Department of Agriculture turns out before they take action.

The discovery may come at an awkward time for Monsanto, which has been under attack on social networks and at rallies for its work with genetically modified products. A recent provision in the federal budget bill that eliminated court oversight of Monsanto and others exacerbated consumer concerns. Web sites like Organic Consumers Association and March Against Monsanto promote boycotts and other consumer actions. On the industry side, several supporters and spokespeople said that "literally trillions of meals with GE ingredients have been consumed since these crops were first commercialized in 1996, with no ill effects on anyone attributable to genetic engineering, and that safety record will continue." To protesters with other data, and with concerns about longer-range effects, those are not necessarily reassuring words.

Weather 

Whether the wheat is genetically modified or not, farmers still have to deal with the weather. The Oklahoma Wheat Growers Association said that rains during the weekend of June 1 and into the next week could delay spring wheat planting. Severe storms could harm growing crops. They noted that Europe continues to be unseasonably cold, while Russia is hot, and Australia has the rain that it needed.

The May 31 tornadoes in Oklahoma moved northeast late on Friday, toward Missouri and Illinois. Much of the Midwest is due for thunderstorms, hail, and rain.. But as the weather moves away from the Plains states, better growing conditions will return. Wheat in the Pacific Northwest and mountain states will have calm sunny days as well.



Michigan winter wheat field, May 24, 2013 [Micki Glueckert photo.]

Other news

The National Association of Wheat Growers is still focused on the agriculture bill making its way through Congress. It's interested in the proposed Clean Water Act regulations that the National Association of Wheat Growers says would "dramatically expand" oversight of wetlands and waterways. The NAWG notes that the U.S. Wheat Association forecasts of a doubling of  wheat trade by the year 2050, without providing details of where the increased crop yields or farm land will come from.

All Aboard Wheat Harvest, a blog sponsored by the herbicide company Syntenga and others, follows the lives of several families who contract to harvest crops throughout the U.S. and into Canada.  Using their own combines, trucks, and other equipment they bring in wheat, soy, corn, barley, and other grains for farmers throughout most of the United States, and into Canada. They've just started publishing again, as they prepare for a new season, and start spreading out to fields across the country for the 2013 harvest.


Another Michigan winter wheat field, May 24, 2013 [Micki Glueckert photo].